t.o.k.u

there he sits,

stretching himself into an almost impossible angle,

his grey-green eyes curious,

following my every movement.

daylight floods inside,

turning his pupils into slits,

he runs after imaginary mice,

and I turn on the perfect

background music,

to watch his antics,

the schlippenbach quartet.

there he comes now,

sniffs a spot next to me, curls up comfortably,

and begins the chase,

in his dreams.

sky changes again,

pulls on her night attire,

my don of the darkness,

his green-grey irises

turning pitch black, arches

his back in anticipation,

another night of adventure.

dawn knocks at the windows,

he creeps in closer, mewing softly,

his whiskers teasing me awake,

and nips my cheek gently.

i smile.

another perfect day.

driftwood

the sea churns around me,

the lone shipwreck

i panic, reach out

without a thought

and grab a driftwood

we drift

the sea still furious,

foams and froths

suddenly,

i realise the driftwood

has a mind of its own

i look up,

my driftwood

yawns widely,

flashing teeth

sharper than knife!

i gasp and let go

backpedal a bit

and look around in panic

i spot another driftwood

i splash my way to it

nervously, i make sure

'tis no cretin

that wants a piece of me

relief pours into me

flushing out panic

i grab again. gladly

we drift

the sea still furious

foams and froths

i see the glistening sands

of the shore

just ahead

gratitude spills out of me

i become effusive

my mind goes

on an emotional drivel

my palms turn sweaty and slippery

o, when i least expect

the driftwood

slips my fingers

i fight hard

to get a grip

i must be losing my mind

i thought i heard

the driftwood mutter

"sho shweet"

and smirk at my struggle

i fight harder

and reach out to the driftwood

that eludes me.

you can't leave me yet,

i plead, thrashing at the

injustice of it all

the shore, just ahead!

that's when my twin,

the survivor

takes over

impatient as she is

at my clingy ways.

"swim to the shore",

she says fiercely

her whispering voice,

a gale of force

that propels me

to the seashore

as i swim

the sea recedes

and the shore beckons

hope surges in me

i am not done in,

not yet!

my twin, the survivor

smiles and says,

"no, we are not.

not ever".

sunny side up

the clinking glasses
drown their silent pleas
the smiling faces
splash a vibrant hue
over their lacklustre misery
graffitis and twirling summer dresses
make for perfect evening strolls
and their livelihood
just a mere annoyance...

...until you meet their eyes
so close, yet so far
the windows to their souls
that never has been served
anything
sunny side up


* valencia is a sunny paradise where cafés sprawl over to streets and people lounge all night long, drinking and nibbling on tapas. african immigrants with shoulder perches displaying knick-knacks of all kinds, weave in and out of these tableau, for all we care, almost invisible.

courtesy, nishi...

8 TV Shows I Love to Watch:

friends
sex and the city (hated the film, though)
alles was zählt (learnt my german more or less from watching this)
simpsons
american dad
drawn together
monkey dust
top cat (fell in love with the drooly voice of top cat)

8 Favorite Places to Eat:

in chennai,
benjarong, the thai place
the seafood restaurant near spurtank road (forgot the name, but can still remember the taste of their kariveppelai meen thingie :)
saravana bhavan

in berlin
de phat (vietnamese)
Nil (sudanese fastfood joint)
the italian place where i go for brunch sometimes

in valencia
the cafeteria at the natural history museum

in bangalore
the tibetan place somewhere near mg road

8 Things That Happened Yesterday:

woke up in a dodgy youth hostel in perpignan, france
listened to two middle aged men, one from spain and another from the netherlands discuss the biking escapade of the dutch -- he biked from rotterdam to perpignan in two weeks -- over breakfast
took a train to port bau, spain
took a train to barcelona
walked around with my bag clutched firmly in barcelona, looking for a place to eat and pee before taking another train
took a train to valencia
shared travel stories with my other flatmates, who had also gone travelling
watched an audrey hepburn film


8 Things I Look Forward To:

my friend luba's visit to valencia in sept
my friend özlem's visit to valencia in october
my one week in berlin end sept
speaking spanish
autumn
my new flat that i will be moving into beginning of next month
spending time with my to-be flatmate's dog, kin
wearing my new autumn jacket


8 Things I Love About Winter:

the clothes: people say i go crazy with winter jackets. but i love them...
end of winter sale (i like this more than end of summer sale :)
cool, crisp mornings after a reaaaaaaaaaaally hot shower
not worrying about eating a lot (layers and layers to hide the extra bulges and i need the fat to keep me warm)
ice skating (i suck but i still love to go to the rink and watch others)
the way how even a peep from the sun changes the mood of the people around me
curling up with a book next to the radiator (ideally, it would be a fireplace...)
the snow, of course


8 Things on my Wish List:

go to far flung places like antartica or easter island
learn to play guitar
create something artsy
stop dressing haphazard and create a style of my own
get a valid licence in europe so i can rent a car and do road trips
straight sleek hair
alternate between living in india and berlin (and a couple of other cities thrown in, if possible)
a huge wine cellar of my own


8 Things I’m Passionate About :

reading
writing
travelling
photographing
music
films
good wines
food

8 Words or Phrases I Use Often:

basically
actually
scheisse (shit in german)
joder (fuck in spanish)
fuck off
really?
oh yeah
ja, ja, ja


8 Things I Have Learned From My Past:

to trust my instincts, unconditionally
that i don't have to be rich to lead a life i want
i cannot please everyone
if it's not worth the trouble, i stay away from it
where there's a will, there is a way
help if i can
every road leads to something
you have a choice: to let life pull you under or to go with the flow


8 Places I Would Love to Go or See or Visit:

amsterdam
New zealand
bhutan
Greece
africa
dominican republic
south america
mongolia

8 Things I Currently Need or Want:

learn how to use my camera properly (i am still discovering new features)
watch inglorious basterds
a laptop that is tiny enough to travel around with and that can support photoshop (mine crashes if i run the programme)
to give up smoking
a wardrobe for my new room
a bicycle that is good enough to go long distances
some sort physical exercise routine
learn to swim properly

this one goes out to the boy with the sax...

it came crashing in on me
with no hooks, no chorus,
no conventional tune or beat.
yet my heart's singing!
rhythm at its best...
this one goes out to the boy with the sax!

the travel jinx

this time round, after going through a few tense moments before boarding the flight to valencia, i came to the conclusion that i am jinxed, one way or the other, when it comes to flying.

there was a time when i was routinely missing flights and paying anything between 50 and 100 euros extra to catch the next flight. now that i finally learnt to manage my time, i am getting caught these days with a couple of kilos more than i should have. somehow, when my turn comes, it is always very strict airport officials that i pick, who charge me anything between 50 and 100 euros, despite me using the age-old tricks in the book -- for instance, producing tears at will. before it worked perfectly!

i wonder what comes next when i learn to pack just the right amount? going by my experiences, definitely something is in store for me...

what a fall!

yesterday, my world came crashing down. literally. the massive wardrobe in my room toppled -- thankfully, a second after i moved away -- and i panicked. my mind went on an autopilot, and i started to dial the numbers of all the male friends that i could think of. when i failed to recruit anyone to play the part of a valiant knight, i went to the kitchen, spent exactly 15 minutes self pitying. a coffee and cigarette later my spirit emerged from the dump it was hiding and i decided to tackle the issue on my own.

heeeeeeeeave-hoooooooo, and up went my wardrobe. as it was already late, i didn't have time to indulge in anything else but put my things back in their place and hit the sack. but this morning when i woke up, and saw the upright wardrobe, i felt a sense of well being. it is funny how i assumed as it's heavy, it should be a man's job. and how desolate i felt when i realised i have none at my disposal! but hey, it didn't take me long to figure out if tackled in a angle, weight could be lifted easily. a lesson learnt, there.

next time i think i will not be that hasty in calling up the band of boys.